Final Post

MY ISP IS FINISHED!!!  80 PAGES!!!!  I know right??  How ridiculous is that??  My program is now basically over, just a few more days of fun evaluations and reflections with the group up in the mountains somewhere.  Other than that, my South African adventure is coming to a close.  

I haven't had much time to think about what I'm going to write for my last entry as I've been working so much on my ISP, so I've decided to not make this entry as lengthy as what you might think.  

I've learned SO much during my time here in South Africa I'm not even sure I know where to begin.  It seems like it was just yesterday that I arrived at the airport in Johannesburg, awaiting in great anticipation of what lay ahead on my journey.  I'm going to remember all the people who I've met, the friends that I've made in the country, and the wonderful families that I stayed with.  But I also can't forget the reasons for why I chose to study here.  I'm came here to learn about reconciliation and development; to see how the people of South Africa have reconciled their differences coming from the darkness and oppression that makes up their past.  I came here to learn about poverty and the effects that it has on individuals; I wanted to learn about the people and how they interact and get along with one another-more importantly I suppose, if they get along with one another.  

As all of these things are rolling through my head at the moment, I'm trying to sum up the current state of South Africa based on the information that I have gathered from different people I have met along the way.  The general consensus seems to be that South Africa's situation is getting worse instead of better.  In thinking back to Kennedy Road, I remember hearing that the number of shack settlements have tripled since SA received its independence in 1994.  The rich and poor gap is still one of the largest in the world, although there is an emerging black middle class.  Crime is rampant as it has been for a long time.  Walking down the street every single home on a block is surrounded by its own security and barbed wire fences.  People here learn to look behind them with every step they take, to make sure that no potential mugger, murderer, or rapist is gaining on them.  

A woman or child is raped every 5 seconds in this country, and the issue of violence against women still has not received the attention it deserves.  There are fathers who come home in the middle of the night, drunk, in an attempt to self-medicate themselves from the frustrations of unemployment, and they attempt to use their wife and daughters as prostitutes by dropping them off alone in the middle of Richard's Bay.  It happens every night.  Street children, a nearly 50% unemployment, and a violent crime rate that is astounding...I am only left to think about what my role is in this situation.  

Despite all of these depressing statistics, some undeniable improvements have been made in the relations that people have with each other since the Apartheid era.  I am now sitting at my favorite internet cafe on Florida Road, and adjacent to my table is an Indian woman and a white man sitting next to each other have a conversation.  Yesterday I saw a black man and a white woman laughing together discussing their jobs.  The different races work together doing the same job in the kitchen of this restaurant-although that doesn't necessarily mean that they are treated equally, this is a huge step.  A person would never have seen any of these things occurring 14 years ago.  

Change is possible.  It may be slow as hell, and believe me South Africa still has a long way to go in improving race relations, but it's a step.  Since coming here I've also had to come to terms with the fact that for a person like me, there really isn't much that can be done to fix some of these larger societal issues.  It's unfortunate to say that so much of the power lies in the government-and for South AFrica that is not a comforting fact.  But I believe that there is always something we can do, even if it seems as though hope is dismal.  The thing to figure out, is what?  What do I do now?  Why did I come here?  

In coming here I was hoping to clear up some of my confusion about my place in the world as well as what I was meant for, what my destiny was so to speak.  And I have to admit that the opposite has happened.  When I get off the plane and feel my feet touch the North American continent again, I will be a much more confused person, than I was when my feet left.  Maybe my purpose for coming here was simply to learn-to learn and take the information wherever I decide to take it.  I have learned how to be happy since being on this trip, and I've learned what power a simple smile can have on a person whose life holds little except destitution.  

I'm not sure where I'm going with that thought.  I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have a ways to go before I figure out what I'm supposed to do with all of this knowledge.  The world is a big place, with a lot of people to help, with a lot of people to meet, with a lot of things to see and do, and a lot of beauty to take in.  What's next?  

I'm leaving you now with 2 final pictures: the first is a drawing that a prisoner drew and that I found in my work with the restorative justice organization.  The second is another wonderful, inspiring quote from Nelson Mandela engraved on a monument that I took a long time ago at the beginning of our trip to the Apartheid Museum.  This is one of my favorite photos and I was saving it for something special.  Let these photos make you feel however you like.  

If you can't make out the quote, it says "To be free is not merely to cast off one's chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others."  What a man huh?

So long South Africa, my heart will always have a place with you here, and you will forever have a place in my heart.

Short Entry for Quick Pics

Sawbonani!  I'm not even sure if that's how you spell it.  Anyways, I hope you all are well, this is going to be a very short entry just to share some quick things with you all.  These are all pictures of Robben Island, where Nelson Mandella was imprisoned.  I never posted these after we toured the island and I feel that they're pretty special, so I wanted to be sure that I shared them with all of you back there in the States.  Just for a very quick update on me, I'm almost finished in Eshowe for the research portion of my ISP, and I have to say that I've learned a great deal of amazing things.  I finished interviewing all of the female prisoners that I was able to on Friday afternoon, and some of the things I was able to get from them was absolutely inspiring.  I even got to do yoga with them :)  I'll be back in Durban for the rest of my time in South Africa starting Thursday and then at that time I will be doing the hard part-writing this massive report.  I've also decided that this is going to be my 2nd to last entry and I'm going to try to write up something pretty special for my last post, so keep on the lookout.  It'll be a little while since I'm going to be focusing mainly on my report, but not too long!  3 more weeks left-wow...can't believe it.  Enjoy the new pics :)

These are some penguins that live on the island.  I got to stand right next to them hehe.  This one is for you Courtney!
This is a picture of a hall where the beds were for the prisoners at the time when Nelson Mandella was incarcerated.  This is no longer a prison and there currently are no prisons on Robben Island anymore.  It is now one of the most beautiful places in the world (in my opinion at least), and many buildings have been turned into schools and community centers, including some of the former prisons.  It is so peaceful there-very few people inhabit the island and everyone works together to keep it the wonderful place that it is.  Change is possible!

Here's the sign right before you walk into the prison.  The top is in English, and the bottom language is Afrikaans.  
And here's the very special picture-Nelson Mandella's cell where he was kept for fighting for the freedom of all South Africans-of humanity in general.  Because after all, as Martin Luther King Jr. said, "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice anywhere."  I can't believe that I got the chance to see this.  Look at the size of this-it's smaller than my closet.  I wonder what he was thinking when he was in this cell night after night.  

And here's the last picture of the cell just from another angle.  That's his bedding, I'm not sure if he really slept on the floor or if they just removed the bed.  But what continues to amaze me is that he wasn't afraid to go to prison for the dignity and lives of others.  I'm not sure if many people are willing to do that anymore.  How did he keep himself emotionally and mentally alive while he was in there for 20 some years?  What extraordinary will power.  

More Pictures :)

"Skies of Blue & Clouds of White."
Eeew..this one is really blurry.  Sorry about that!  But you can see the "Modest Living" of these conditions.  That round thing behind the main structures, I slept in a hut just like that!
"Sweet Child of Mine"  That's a picture of one of my host sisters named Tombazonke who was a bit older, holding my little host brother Guleku-the youngest of the family.  Ndomisu just happened to pop in as always-hehe.  I'll never forget how they all took care of each other. 
"Way To the Beach!"  This was on the way to the beach with some of my little host brothers and sisters in the rural area.  It was on my last day with them.
"To Live Like This."  It's a little ironic that there is this kind of lookout right next to a rural school with all of its conditions.  
"Where The Streets Have No Name"  And yes, that is a song...by U2
"Life From Both Sides Now" If you guys know that Joni Mitchell song (one of my favorite songs and my mom's as well) you'll understand the title of this picture.  I call it that because it makes me think of all of the things that I've seen here so far in South Africa.  The extreme highs, and the lows that represent this country-the 1st world, and the 3rd world, the rich and the extreme poor...The picture has both beauty and an ominous sense as well with the clouds above.  It's life from all angles.  
Another picture that I took from on top of a mountain-the same day that I saw where "Blood Diamond" was filmed.  Here's South Africa's true gorgeousness.  I'm so fortunate-some people go through their entire lives never seeing things like this.  I'm so lucky that I have.  
"Stoned Memories"  I took this picture at the Apartheid Museum and it's a memorial representing all of the people who died for freedom during the Soweto protests.  One stone, stands for 1 person killed.  Can you believe it?

"Clarity"  I took this just as the sun was setting in the rural area.  This is the view from my rural home-how lucky are they that they get to go to bed to that every night?  :)
Here's a picture of Ndomisu and Senele that I don't think I ever posted haha.  I call this one "Dancin' Fools"  I miss them so much :)  

I also posted an entry of text today as well that's written below this post :)

ISP (Independent Study Project)

Hey guys!  I know that its been awhile since I've updated and I apologize.  Internet access is hard to come by at this point and it's also not free anymore.  But it's Saturday April 19th now and I have less than a month until I'm back in the States!  I can't believe it...it's all gone by so fast.  But enough of the cheesy reflections, I know you all really want to know what I'm up to at the moment.  

I'm now on the final portion of my trip-the scary Independent Study Project portion.  For those of you who don't know this is when each of the students in my group choose a topic of whatever they choose, and they go off to wherever they want to in South Africa to research that topic for a few weeks, and then they have to write at a minimum, a 40 page report about it.  So, right now I am all by myself (not really, I'm just not with any of the other students) in a small town called Eshowe working with a restorative justice organization (they try to do rehabilitative work with prisoners within the prisons) known as Phoenix Zululand.  

The focus for my specific project is the creative arts as a way of healing.  Phoenix has an "art as a way of healing" program that they implement within the prisons, and I'm trying to research how the art that the prisoners create is helping these prisoners to express their emotions, express themselves, etc.  There is also a drama program that Phoenix holds and I'm trying to incorporate this as well within my project.  Phoenix is giving me a lot of responsibility; they gave me piles and piles and more piles of artwork to analyze that various prisoners have created so that I can see what themes seem to be coming up and what details about various aspects of the prisoner's lives are being conveyed.  They also want me to talk to some of the art facilitators about some of the issues I'm finding and how the art program can be improved.  

This is an extremely special project for me as I'm considering going into art therapy.  And not only that, but because I have such a passion for the arts (especially music and drama, as many of you know) I'm getting the opportunity to really prove to people how the creative arts mean so much more to so many people than simply a form of entertainment or something pretty to look at.  

Next week I'm getting the opportunity to go into the women's prison here in Eshowe to interview them about a very successful art project that they took part in, in which they took magazine photos and created a collage about their lives.  Just looking at them I was extremely moved by what these women were able to create.  Through these collages stories are told of abuse, drugs, but also of hope and a desire to start a new life.  

I'm also living with a former inmate of Eshowe prison named Tembalethu.  She's a super awesome woman and her and I have had some amazing conversations about why she was in prison, about how she realized all the people she hurt and how prison helped her to realize that she could no longer continue with a life of stealing from other people-not just because prison was such an awful place which it was and still is, but because of the damage it did to others.  I love her.  She now works with Phoenix going into the prisons facilitating discussions with inmates about different issues.  We also talked about the issue of violent offenders and how prison is really the only place for them to go as they can't be allowed to stay in society.  Phoenix might say otherwise, but she wouldn't agree, and I for right don't either.  That's another tricky issue that people have yet to solve.  

I'd like to share a quick story of someone I already interviewed who is now an ex-inmate living in a township here in Eshowe.  As I was looking through the artwork I saw a picture that she and another woman drew that had to do with many of their life experiences.  From this picture they wrote a play and performed it in the prison with Phoenix's drama program.  I went to interview this woman about the play she performed and how it helped her as a person, and I found out that she is now living in a shack, similar to those of the shack settlements I've talked about a few times in previous entries.  She has no bed, hardly any clothes, her father is crippled, she ran away from home when she was young because of abuse, and now she has a baby and relies on money from friends to make it day by day.  She cried during the interview.  

This is another forgotten person of South Africa-a woman who has faced severe hardship through no fault of her own, and now she is constantly made fun of by fellow neighbors for being a former prisoner.  She is now trying desperately hard to feed her sick baby and mentioned that although she would have liked to take her drama talents further, all of her dreams have been "shattered...they were just dreams.  I cry a lot now."  In her words.  She mentioned how life is harder now than it was even before she got into prison.

There are people living like this all over South Africa, and it explains my love-hate relationship with this country.  Ever since then I've been rethinking my role as well as the role of the rest of the world's role in helping people like this woman.  I'm beginning to think that because so much of it is government related there's really not much an ordinary person can do except for donate money every now and then.  I am now even more confused about what I want to do with my life than I was before I left for South Africa.  

But on a lighter note, Eshowe reminds a lot of small suburbs or towns back in Minnesota.  It has a peaceful, friendly ambiance to it, and it makes me miss home more and more.  I like being here more and more because it does remind me so much of home.  But listening to all these stories of these prisoners has made me realize how lucky and blessed I am to have supportive family and friends, as so many of the people I've been meeting lately have neither.  I'll be coming back home as I said in less than a month, to see all of you whom I love so much, and I have to say quite frankly that I am very excited :)

Lastly, yesterday that woman whom I interviewed got a chance to take her baby to the doctor with the money that the 3 of us (another student, the woman I'm living with, and I) gave her during the interview and now her baby's asthma has been treated and is doing very well.  One of the Phoenix members came up with an idea of giving her things to sell so that she can start her own business and make some immediate income.  Maybe things will start to look up for her now.  

Picture Time :)

Sorry this one is lopsided.  It's the famous poster of a man carrying Hector Pieterson's body during the Soweto protests.  The woman in the background is Hector's older sister.  "Only the Good Die Young"

"Leo Was Here!"  This is one of the sights where "Blood Diamond" was filmed!
This is a group of residents from the Kennedy Road shack settlement that we visited.  That structure behind them is one of their houses-made out of pieces of cardboard and what looks like blankets.  They allowed me to take their picture because the group who brought us there wanted us to let people in America know about their suffering.  These are "The Forgotten People of South Africa."
"Lord of the Valleys"  Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?

The Healing of Memories (scroll down to the text and read that before looking at the pictures)

Today I met a lot of people living in great destitution, and I visited sights of some of the most deadly, infamous incidents occurred during apartheid set up in the form of memorials.  I'm not really ready to write about it yet because I'm still trying to process it all.  It hit me even harder than when I visited Kennedy Road, maybe because I met so many children, or because I got more or a chance to interview people and even see inside of their homes made out of pieces of cardboard and garbage bags.  

Here, children and adults take part in violence due to the extreme frustration they have to deal with day after day.  Some of them have been waiting for houses for 30 years, but the government that claims to be an all inclusive democracy could care less about their plight.  Little kids living on these streets came up to us holding our hands and wanting to leave with us, and I met a 9 year old girl named Nikita who has become a part of the anti-eviction campaign through writing letters to the government to give her people, whom she feels such a deep connection with, the houses they need to survive and the care that should be given to all people, but unfortunately is not.  

As I said, I don't think I can write details today as it is an experience that is still sore in my mind as it only happened a few hours ago.  I need to process through it all myself before I can full share it with others, which is what these people want us to do-share it with the world so that people will hopefully come join in their fight.  The man who led us through these eviction shack settlements believed that as American students we had the power to bring about great change, and he also acknowleged that there were impoverished, and other suffering people in America as well.  His point of view, was that we have a responsibility to help those Americans, and the suffering in South Africa simultaneously, not by sacrificing one for the other.  I've heard the argument several times that people need to start taking care of our country first before we can move on to others in the world, and to an extent I've began to agree with this way of thinking.  But something this man said truly struck me; he said that if we make our struggle, their struggle, there won't be a need to help one group of people before another, but instead help each other together.  

In other words, if we make the struggle of the suffering in America, also the struggle of the suffering here in South Africa (of which I've learned there are a great many), the struggle of the suffering in Darfur, the struggle of the suffering in Iraq, etc...then we'll be a stronger people where no one will have to be ignored.  This is an inspiring mode of thought that brings wonderful dreams of possibilities to the imagination-now the next step is to find out whether or not it is possible in reality where there are much more complicated issues that seem to prevail time and time again.  

At the Institute for the Healing of Memories which I visited today, I learned that there are ways to heal the pains of the past through realizing that there are those who care, and realizing that a smile can bring more to a person than what we can imagine.  Since I'm an internet cafe in Cape Town right now which has a stronger connection, I'm able to upload more pictures of my rural home stay famile-you know, the one with the 14 kids :)  They bring a smile to my face, and I don't want to depress you guys too much.  So I'm keeping my promise that I would share more pictures of the kids with all of you.  Enjoy! 

P.S. And yes I realize that the pictures are above this entry, so I'm sorry if this sounds anti-climactic, but I can't figure out how to put them below the text.  I guess I should have written my entry before uploading the pictures.  Just look at the pictures again after reading this and then my writing will make more sense :)

Another Chapter

Good day to all of you!  I feel like its been forever since I updated last; sorry about that, I haven't had internet access in so long and I've been running around like crazy doing about 1 million different things!  

Anyway, just to update you all on the things that have happened so far, as of right now I'm in Cape Town and starting a new chapter on my expedition.  Cape Town is the city in South Africa that is shown to all the tourists and dreamers who wish to travel.  I can't contest this completely as it is an absolutely beautiful place with some of the most gorgeous scenery that a person will ever see.  I can't believe that I have the opportunity to experience a place with this much incredible ambiance and some people never get to leave their hometown.  On the flip side however, this is only my 2nd day in Cape Town and already 3 homeless people, including 2 street children have come up to me begging for money or food.  Tomorrow we're going to be visiting the miles and miles of shack settlements (just like Kennedy Road which I talked about in a previous entry) that the government hides from all of the traveling foreigners.  Somehow I don't think it will be that much of an eye opening experience considering that I've seen hundreds of those all over South Africa already-a sad fact but unfortunately true.  

I also just finished a home stay with a bi-racial family whom I could relate to being bi-racial myself.  Although I was only there for 3 days I was able to make a strong connection with everyone I met.  The hardships they've experienced is beyond belief and I never thought I'd meet anybody who has been through something quite like what they went through.  My home stay mother's daughter was murdered less than a month ago by her boyfriend and the boyfriend hung himself in jail as he was stricken with guilt for his crimes.  The murdered daughter and the boyfriend left behind a 4 year old daughter who my home stay mother is now raising as her own.  She is also housing her 14 year old niece whose parents are both severe alcoholics.  I had an amazing older host brother named Gregory who I swear has to be one of the most gentle, compassionate, caring men I have ever met, and I feel for him so much at the loss of his sister in such a tragic way.  

On a more positive note yesterday we toured the prison on a place called Robben Island where Nelson Mandella was held and we got to see the cell he was kept in as well.  To give you an idea on the size of his cell, think of the size of your closet and cut it in half.  But the island is now a place of great scenic imagery which is a big change from the desolation that the people living there once experienced during the time of the prisons.  The prison Nelson Mandella was in is no longer a prison and is now a site for tourists who want to learn about the struggles of freedom fighters in South Africa during the apartheid era, and the other prisons on the island are being used for schools and community meeting places for the 350 people now inhabiting the island.  Change really is possible!  The people on the island are thriving and as I was there I couldn't help but think that I wanted to stay.  There were penguins on the island and I got to stand right next to them and take pictures!  I'll upload when I get the chance.  

Lastly, to let you guys know that I'm also doing fun things and not serious things, I went to South Africa's woodstock (kinda) called Splashy Fen!!  It was awesome, especially for a music freak like me :)  I met some really cool hippie people and even got to hang out with some of the bands!  Don't worry it was no one really famous or anything, just some people who want to spread some great music.  I've also decided what I'm going to do for my month long ISP; I'm going to be working with the Phoenix Restorative Justice Program-the same organization I met when I talked about the prison in an earlier entry.  I'm going to be working with an art therapy program that is being done with some of the prisoners at a maximum security prison called Empangeni.  I'm going to get a chance to interview prisoners on their experiences with violence prior to their incarceration and see how those experiences have affected them, and then I'm going to see how the art therapy program is helping them to express themselves thereby, also helping them to heal.  I'm excited, but nervous at the same time.  

I'll talk to you all again soon I promise!